She's dating him now... don't know what or how to feel.

Saw the writing on the wall, really. Things just wouldn't work out the way they were going.
Guess it's all for the best. I wasn't going to change, not the way she needed me to.
Still I feel a deep deep sorrow for all that's happening. Seven years going down the drain. I'm left with two cats and an empty house full of memories of broken dreams and promises...
My best friend want's to talk to me... what's there to talk about? He's dating my soon to be ex wife!
He asked me how I feel! How the hell should I know? I feel really really pissed. I feel deeply cheated/betrayed! I have a knot the size of a watermelon on my throat! How can i put it in to words?! Don't really know. Sure as hell don't care.
I try not to think about all of this... To keep my sanity, to keep me safe from harm. To take time to let it all really sink in.

She'll be leaving the house in the meantime. Got her self a job, has found a house to stay.
We were supposed to sign the divorce two days ago, but couldn't bear to do it; guess it all didn't sink in for both of us... need more time, we postponed it for a month or so. Started to decide who gets what and it went well, no problems there, thankfully.

She ask me if I found someone... -No I didn't. Been looking? - No, not really! Interested in someone? - No I'm not.
At this time it's the last thing on my mind. I've just got burned!!! Badly... Think I'll wait a while to play with fire again...

It's Summer again. Always been the worst part of the year for me! I really can't stand the heat. And everybody enjoys their Summer vacations, I'm always working all the bloody season!
Argh.... The heat makes it all unbearable for me.

Thinks for listening.


Life's a bitch. Can't have it any other way....